Nearly one in four Americans say the Internet can serve as a substitute for a significant other for at least some period of time according to a new poll by Zogby International and 463 Internet Attitudes. At its snippiest the press release touts that "Not surprisingly, the percentage was highest among singles, of which 31% said it could be a substitute." Thanks for the judgment, Internet. I love you a little less now.
The poll, with 9,743 adult respondents and a +/– 1.0 percentage point margin of error, was more generally targeted at the way people interact with the Internet and whether the government should play a larger role in regulating the relationship.
The answer is apparently yes. Mostly. More than half of Americans believe the government should step in to regulate content like video, with the number jumping to 72% of respondents over 70 years old who would like to see regulation and ratings. That means no more taking YouTube out for an ice cream and a Coke without a chaperone, you young whippersnappers.
And don't even think about "running out of gas" at Lover's Lane. Because while America is ready to go steady with the Internet. It doesn't want to go all the way. Only 11% of respondents said they would be willing to "implant a device into your brain that enabled you to use your mind to access the Internet if it could be done safely." 17% of men were game while only 7% of women wanted to access the Internet with their mind. I'm pretty sure there's a post-modern gender studies thesis in there somewhere.
Regardless, we here at 60secondscience.com are just happy you're here spending time with us, even if we're just friends. But if you ever get a completely safe implant in your head to access us with your mind, we'll totally call you the next day.
[The complete press release, demographic breakdown, and polling figures are at 463.blogs.com]
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