Ted Alvarez on December 11, 2007 5:34 PM
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No, no you sickos -- today's Giftology item isn't the remains of Heidi Klum's pre-Victoria's Secret Television Special visit to the "secret doctor." But it is five pounds of luscious, anatomically correct replica fat made from pliable, long-lasting vinyl.
It's supposed to be for "educational" purposes, but it's got plenty of better uses. Could your significant other stand to lose a few? There's no stronger motivator than dropping this puppy on the plate the next time he/she asks for another slice of cake. How about a weak-stomached vegetarian friend? This'll keep them from keeping that tofu-seitan sandwich down -- all day long.
Continue reading '60 S.S. Giftology: Five-pounds of model fat!' >
Ted Alvarez on December 10, 2007 4:48 PM
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I'm known for my strong stomach: in elementary school, I was the kid who made money by eating different, gross combinations of lunchroom food. Don't laugh — peaches mixed with square hamburgers and every condiment available bought me a community college education. So when a story messes with my cast-adamantium stomach, you know it's pretty sick.
11 workers at Quality Pork Processors in St. Paul, MN, developed numbness, tingling and weakness in limbs and extremities, called chronic inflammatory demyelinating polyneuropathy, after working at the "head table," where they chop up pigs' heads and fire compressed air into the skulls to remove the brains. Scientists at the Mayo Clinic suspect inhaled airborne brain matter may have somehow triggered the illness.
Everyone, you have my permission to hork before continuing with this article.
Continue reading 'OMG-we-wish-we-were-kidding-dept: Airborne pig brain matter may cause neurological disorder in pork industry workers' >